Blue

Blue…July 11, 2005




Ive got "the blues", as they say. I dont know what to do about it, other than just ignore them. I did absolutely nothing this weekend, other than lay on the couch upstairs and watch movies. Absolutely useless, that is what keeps rolling through my mind when I think about what I could have done with my time. Well, I did get caught up on my sleep at least. Sunday I didnt get out of bed until 4pm. It felt good in a way, but for the rest of the daylight hours I felt like crap. My body is too old to do those things anymore. When I was younger I could stay up all night, sleep till noon and feel fine. Those days are long over. My body hates me nowadays. And vice versa. I think I will start walking the treadmill again, maybe that will help me with my energy level. I still need to stop drinking altogether. Ive taken care of the drinking on the weeknights dillemma, now I need to deal with weekends. I just get bored, and it seems like I am addicted to carbonation, so when I get home on Friday nights all I want is a cold beer. Maybe I should get non alcoholic beer? Hmmm that thought never occurred to me before. I shall do that this weekend! Stellar! Today, I need to get a realtor to help me find a place to move, I am getting restless at mom and dads, and I need to move forward with things. These are all things I know: I need to stop drinking, I need to stop being depressed, I need to move into my own space. Easier said than done. Think good thoughts for me, I need a duplex or somethng small with a yard for Cody. Hopefully a realtor will be able to help me.